Until
I was 10 years old, Valentine’s Day was a day in which my classmates and I
exchanged goofy little cards that we dropped into handmade pouches taped to the
sides of our desks. Some years one of
the not so frazzled class moms would bring in cupcakes or we would munch on
some of those dry, powdery conversation hearts after we tried to create every
dirty sentence we could out of them.
That was the extent of it. My
parents probably went out. I remember a
heart shaped box of chocolate or two. I was usually the recipient of such a box but Valentine’s Day really was a non
event in our household.
In
1980, the year of my 10th birthday, my baby sister was born. On February 14th. In the years
that followed, February 14th was my sister’s birthday, not Valentine’s
Day. We were special now. Within the confines our immediate family, Valentine’s Day fell
behind the back burner and onto the floor.
It was fine with us. Birthdays
meant cake. Cake is good. This was not a negative
happening. There was still the goofy
card exchange at school, lots of heart shaped crafts in art class, and I still
received the obligatory heart box of chocolate each year.
Now though, there was a reason, a real reason, for us to celebrate. We were the coolest. We had a heart baby.
When
my baby sister reached school age, the months of January and February were
spent peddling cookies for the local scouts. Selling (and buying) cookies took a significant amount of time, energy, money, and patience. Valentine’s Day continued to hide out in the
background. Cookies were now considered
a valentine treat. I was too old for the school parties at this point and after
the scout cookies and a birthday party, it took no trouble at all to brush away this silly heart holiday.
Now in my head all of this non Valentine activity made perfect sense. I was a realist. My heart, though, had a different wish. It wished for one of those romantical,
lovey-dovey, 10 minute kiss on the balcony, dinner, drinks, dancing, and a walk
on the beach nights all rolled into one heart shaped evening of bliss. When I traded in living with the family unit for a place of
my own, I decided I would still celebrate my sister’s birthday but I had to start working on my dream date. My Valentine's Day dream date.
No
so much. We had moved from Chicago to
the Daytona Beach area. February in
Daytona Beach isn’t romantic. It isn’t
even remotely romantic. There’s this
little two week event in February called Speed Weeks. Ever heard of the Daytona 500? Every year around the 14th of
February is when that race occurs. That
means the entire county in which I live is filled about two hundred thousand (or so) extra folks. Who wouldn’t want to
travel to Florida in February? Who didn’t want to bask in the sun while
whichever snow riddled city they had traveled from was frozen over? Every restaurant, bar, beach, club within 60
miles was filled to the max with race fans. There are no quiet romantic dates on Valentine's Day in this town.
What
the Fuck?
Once
I was married there were dinners out of town, overnight trips, last minute
chocolate, gas station roses, movies, numerous cute but useless stuffed animals, and even edible underwear to celebrate the
holiday of hearts. Stuff I planned
because I wanted to go somewhere and the holiday was the excuse. Not the undies or the gas station roses, the
other stuff. Deep down I had no interest
in this ridiculous red and pink holiday of hearts but the non-stop commercials
promising diamonds and kisses were wearing me down. Where in the hell was my chocolate diamond,
damn it?
I
never did get a chocolate diamond. Hell, I
never got any diamond. I have countless
numbers of little fuzzy white bears holding red satin hearts. I don’t even know who they’re from anymore
but I have them. Was Valentine’s Day
ever unpleasant? Not that I recall. It just wasn’t the hyped up version of all things love that I had created in my head from seeing all the propaganda. It never will be.
Now
that I’m older, Valentine’s Day itself, means almost zero to me. It’s my sister’s birthday. It’s a race day. It’s cookie day. It’s just another day. I have been married, single, dating, madly in
love, bored to death, and divorced on Valentine’s Day. None was better than the rest. As for my dream date, it will happen one
day. I don’t care what day it is. Love is love.
Infatuation is infatuation. If
it’s right, romance will happen when it’s meant to, not on a day covered in
pink and red hearts.
This
year, I’ll be spending the Valentine holiday with the love of my life. My daughter.
A friend and her son will be joining us.
It will be special. It will be
filled with love. There will be
food. There will be booze. It will be a joyous occassion.
Life is good.
In all
seriousness I would pass on the dream date completely if I could find a man who
could make a reservation without asking me a single fucking question. A goofy card would be cool too.
PPB aka The Precious Princess - The Princess is a twice
divorced, recently dumped, recently unemployed, self-proclaimed member of the
mentally hilarious. She has been referred to as living under a rock stocked
with vodka and anger. Her 12 year old “Mini”, who is carbon copy of the
Princess, is often the subject of blogs, and Facebook posts. In addition, she writes
about dating, the dumbness of boys, life after 40, and shares stories from
Bananaland which is both her past and current residence. She is the owner/sole admin for the Facebook
page Precious
Princess's Guide to Bananaland where she is famous for her rants and her
blunt, honest, and sarcastic look at life.
She blogs both extremely funny and all-the-feels posts at Princess Bananaland. She hates people, kids, and karaoke. She uses
all the swears and makes up dirty words. Eventually when she’s done being sloth-like,
she will write a book. Be afraid.
2 comments:
You and me, both. Valentine's day, schmalentines day. I'll just be hangin' out with the ones I love, and that's all we need!
OMG...you and me BOTH, sista!!!! Done, done and DONE!!!
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